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Excerpts

July 16, 2020 by Andre Fenton

Chapter 1 What Is He Eating?

It’s always an awkward question, no matter the context. I mean, I wonder if the person asking ever feels like they shouldn’t ask — it’s a need to know thing. So I was a tad confused, not really sure why everyone in this room needed to know how much I weighed. It was the beginning of the school year, and we were in Gym class. Mr. Stephens, the teacher, had us come into the weight room in groups of fives to “See where we’re at,” as he put it. The school’s new wellness policy required health check- ins during gym class. Every student had a file that held information about their height, weight, eye colour, hair colour and so on. I really wasn’t a fan of stepping on a scale and revealing how much I weighed, though. I was with a group of five that included myself, Donny, Lewis, Matthew, and Tyler.

“All right,” Mr. Stephens announced. “Donny, you hit the scale first.”

“Whatever,” Donny said.

Donny was a childhood friend of mine. We grew up together in the North End of Halifax. We were like brothers — though time sometimes put distance be- tween us. He would hang out with the more rebellious teens while I was somewhere in between the shy kid who stood against the walls at school dances and the nerd who sat by himself during lunch. But at least I was brave enough to go to a dance, right?

Donny stepped on the scale. He had much longer hair and darker skin than I did. He was also in great shape but didn’t do a lot with it. Mr. Stephens would often hassle him to play football, and Donny would always ignore him. Donny was more of an artistic guy but not pretentious. He was the most humble, genuine guy I knew.

The numbers on the electronic scale went from zero pounds to 193 pounds.

“Not bad,” Donny said as he stepped off.

“Lewis, you’re next.” Mr. Stephens pointed.

Lewis was an asshole. I hated that guy. He was seventeen, a year older than all the other students in the room. He was held back a year. Now he was in class with us. It wasn’t glamorous for him, so he spent most of his time making my life a living hell like it was his hobby. He was what most girls would call a douchebag. I wasn’t brave enough to say it out loud.

Lewis gave Mr. Stephens a sneer with his stupid face and stepped on the scale with his chubby frame, shaved head, and pale skin. It went from zero pounds to 220 pounds.

“Hmm . . .” Mr. Stephens took note of that in his book. “Yo, what was that ‘hmmm . . .’ about, Mr. Stephens?” “It means we have work to do,” he replied.

“Work on me? What about that fatass over there?” Lewis pointed my way.

Those words were like blades. I wasn’t a fan of being called a fatass, but I couldn’t respond and show weakness. That’s what he’d want.

“That’s enough, Lewis.” Mr. Stephens shook his head.

“No. No, it’s not,” Lewis continued. “How much do you weigh, Adrian?”

I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say.

“Enough to knock your dumb ass over,” Donny inter- vened.

“Boys. Enough!” Mr. Stephens yelled. “I have six other groups of students to do this with, and I’m not going to be here all day with your petty crap.”

He took a breath. “With that being said, do you want to go next, Adrian?”

“Sure,” I muttered, not really wanting to. But I also want- ed to get it over with. I stepped closer to the scale, walking past Lewis’s stupid grin. I didn’t want to do it. I really didn’t. I put one foot forward and the other followed. Next thing I knew, both feet were planted and the numbers on the scale went from zero pounds to 280 pounds.

“Ha!” Lewis yelled from behind me. I shut my eyes. I knew there was going to be an insult, but it was overshad- owed by a question. It was a question from Mr. Stephens.

“Adrian, what are you eating?” he asked in a voice of disgust.

I didn’t reply. I turned around and ran out of the weight room. I felt ashamed of myself. I shouldn’t have had to disclose my weight to a room full of people — it felt so wrong. I didn’t want everyone in the school knowing how much I weighed. Anxiety made itself at home inside of me, so I had to leave. Outside, there were other students waiting for their turn in the weight room. I walked past all of them with my head down. Two hundred and eighty pounds of fat — I felt gross.

That afternoon, during our lunch hour, I sat with Donny in the cafeteria. He had a mouthful of sandwich while talk- ing to me.

“Yeah, man. Lewis is full of crap. Don’t pay any mind to him. He’s a loser.”

“I know,” I said while taking my lunch out of my back- pack. I had an egg sandwich. It was the type of food you could smell from halfway across the cafeteria.

“I got your back. If he messes with you, then he’ll have to go through me.”

Donny always felt like he had to play the big brother role for me. He kind of was, but if it came to violence or getting in trouble, I knew he would receive a harsher pun- ishment than me. Because he was darker than I was, people saw him as more “dangerous,” when in reality, he was a big, soft goofball. Violence wasn’t really something I planned for when dealing with Lewis.

“Thanks, Donny, but I think everything will be fine. I don’t want you to get in any trouble.”

It was like I jinxed myself because as I said that, Lewis made his way into the cafeteria with that stupid grin on his face. He peered over at me from the entrance and made his way toward us.

“There’s that asshole,” Donny said under his breath.

Before I knew it, Lewis was right there in front of us. I knew it was going to be bad. I knew it was going to be embarrassing. I just wanted to shout, “Leave me alone!” But I didn’t.

“What’s up, Adrian?” he grinned at me.

“Dude, get out of here,” Donny began.

“I’m not talking to you,” Lewis shot back.

“Well I’m talking to you.” Donny stood up.

The tension was pretty high. They weren’t fans of each other.

“Lewis, leave my guy alone. I’m not messing with you,”

Donny continued.

I sat there, not knowing what to do or say, then suddenly

I looked at my sandwich and I saw Lewis sticking his finger right through the top and down the bottom.

“Hey, what are you doing?” I demanded.

“It’s not like you need that anyway, fatass,” Lewis sneered at me. “You’re almost three hundred pounds!” He said it loud enough for the entire cafeteria to hear. As soon as he said it, my heart sank into my stomach. I could see students eyeing me. I could feel their whispers lingering around me, and I felt sick. It felt like my biggest secret was now an open one.

“You’re such an asshole, Lewis,” Donny growled. “Aha.” Lewis laughed his stupid laugh.

That was when I snapped. I tore the sandwich from under Lewis’s hand and flung it at him.

“What the hell!” he yelled. Gobs of egg covered his cheeks. I could hear laughs from around the cafeteria.

It didn’t take long for Lewis to get the food off of his face. That was when he threw his fist into mine. I honestly hadn’t known what to expect, but a bruised eye wasn’t it. I hit the ground. Hard. All I heard was a collective gasp from the rest of the students. That was what humiliation felt like. It wasn’t great.

I looked up to see Donny jump across the table at Lewis. They started fighting. Throwing fists full of anger back and forth as everyone in the cafeteria chanted, “Fight! Fight! Fight!”

Security soon came in and broke them up. Once that happened, I ran out of the cafeteria both hurt and embar- rassed. I just wanted to go home. I grabbed my belongings from my locker and fought back tears. I couldn’t cry, I couldn’t let myself be weak, so I hid my misery and made my way home.

I was home before my parents so I had time to think of an explanation for the bruise on my face. I went straight to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. It looked pretty bad. I had a huge red mark under my left eye. I couldn’t let that happen again. I couldn’t let Lewis bully me over my weight, I couldn’t allow myself to be his punching bag, and I couldn’t let my parents see me being beat up.

Filed Under: Excerpts, Fiction, Web exclusives, Young Readers Tagged With: Andre Fenton, fiction, Formac Publishing, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Worthy of Love, Young Adult, young readers

July 7, 2020 by Bridget Canning

Some People’s Children
Bridget Canning
Breakwater Books

 

prologue, August, 1974

Maggie wakes on the bed. The bedspread is itchy on her bare skin. Smells like cigarettes. She is alone. It is not her bed.

She remembers standing outside the bathroom. Tony’s voice was a hiss: “I thought you said you were seventeen.” She tried to speak around the lump in her throat: “Please.”

Someone walked by and laughed, sharp and small like a bee sting. Tony pulled her into the bedroom.

“But we care about each other.” She kissed his neck. That’s one of the things he likes. He shook her off. He slammed the bedroom door as he left.

She was crying on the bed when the voices started. The party banged on around the edges of the door, but these were new sounds. Mostly barked commands:

Get back in there, my son.
If you don’t, I will.
Get it get it get it.

And then Tony was back. He shut the bedroom door to a rising cheer. She remembers reaching for him. They’d never been inside before—twice in the woods on a blanket, twice in the backseat. She remembers wishing hard for no one to come in. Please let the door be locked.

And now he’s gone. She has to go home. She sits up.

Cecil Jesso stands by the bed. Her jeans and pullover are bunched in his hands. His pale eyes are bulging like marshmallows. His pants are undone to reveal a triangle of white cotton. Matted hair. She buckles into a ball.

“Cec! Get out of here!”

“This is my room.” He points at her. “You’re on my bed.”

She pulls the bedspread up from under her, to cover herself. Cecil clutches her things to his chest with one hand. He reaches out with the other and grabs the bedspread from her hand. “Lemme see,” he whispers. His bottom lip trembles.

“No!” Maggie swipes at his hand. Her naked breast brushes his forearm. She scrambles to the foot of the bed. It is hard to move away and keep herself covered. She hears Cec’s breath suck in, wet and beastly. He moves closer. No no no no. Everything is no. Everything is help. Her guts fold in on themselves. They remember something sweet and sickly from earlier and don’t want it anymore.

Now Cec is gasping mouthfuls of garbled fury. He drops her clothes and puts his hands to his wet face. Maggie wipes her mouth, panting. The smell of her own bile hits her and she’s sick again, this time off the side of the bed. Cec backs out of the room. “Jesus fucking Christ.”

Her hands move without thought, top on, legs in jeans, underwear and bra shoved in pockets. She stands. Her body sways. Get out, get out. The hallway outside the room reeks of cigarettes and rum. Everyone is gone. She half skates down the hallway, through the kitchen. She snatches her shoes from the porch. Cecil stands in the doorway to the living room, rubbing his face with a towel. “You’re a little savage,” he says.

“You’re a piece of shit. You ever touch me again, you’re dead.”

“I never touched you, Maggie Tubbs,” he says. His voice is sooky and slurry.

A half-empty Labatt 50 bottle sits in the porch, like someone left it when they were tying their shoes. Maggie grabs it around its stubby neck and flings it at him. He steps back, missing the splash of beer. It hits the floor and rolls away.

“When Tony finds out, he’s gonna kill you,” she says. “You’re fucking dead, Cecil Jesso.”

Filed Under: Excerpts, Fiction, Web exclusives Tagged With: Breakwater Books, Bridget Canning, fiction, Newfoundland and Labrador, Newoundland, Some People's Children, St. John's

July 2, 2020 by Hope Dalvay

Camp Fill-in-the-Blank
Hope Dalvay
Nimbus Publishing and Vagrant Press

CHAPTER ONE: A WAKE-UP CALL AT NIGHT

Housing compound, Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. Just before midnight, Monday, May 12, 2003

My eyes suddenly fluttered open. Then I heard the sound that had roused me awake: the wail of sirens, lots of sirens. I slipped out of bed and padded down the carpeted stairs in search of my parents. I sighed with relief when I spied them relaxing on the living-room couch. My parents were so engrossed in the TV show they were watching that they didn’t even notice me standing there in my pajamas. I cleared my throat to get their attention.

“What’s up, little chick?” asked Mom, with a look of concern on her face. “Did you have a bad dream, Page?”

“The sirens woke me up. What’s going on?” I asked.

“Maybe ambulances are rushing to a car accident,” offered Dad. “You know how dangerous the driving is here in Riyadh.”

I nodded. The sirens continued to wail.

“Maybe it’s a really bad car accident,” suggested Dad.

“Why don’t you go back to bed? You’ve got school in the morning,” reminded Mom. “Maybe there will be an article in the morning newspaper about what happened,” she added.

“Okay, Mom,” I said. I turned and headed upstairs to my bedroom. The sirens eventually faded away, and I drifted off to sleep.

Early morning, around 5:30 a.m., Tuesday, May 13, 2003

My eyes suddenly fluttered open again…not to the wail of sirens, but to this disturbing sound: deee ehhh errr…deee uh deee uh. The unmistakeable sound of our dial-up internet. Is there any sound more annoying? I thought. My mom was probably checking our email. It was part of her early morning ritual before heading to work. I decided to get up. It was time to get ready anyway, if I wanted to catch the bus. A typical school morning for me involved eating breakfast, dressing in my school uniform, boarding a blue-and-white bus filled with identically clad children from my compound, and travelling across the city to attend a British school. Because we’re Canadian, my parents would have preferred to send me to a Canadian school, but none existed in Riyadh.

As I crawled out of bed, I heard Mom making an inter-net phone call, which was an odd thing for her to do on a Tuesday morning. Because of the time difference, she normally called her family in Canada on our weekend, which was Thursday and Friday in Saudi Arabia.

My mother was born and raised on Prince Edward Island, Canada’s smallest province. Prince Edward Island, commonly referred to by its abbreviation “PEI” or simply as “the Island,” is so small that it is sometimes left off maps—much to the chagrin of its inhabitants, who like to be called “Islanders” with a capital letter “I.” On an accuratemap of Canada—that is, a map depicting all ten provinces and three territories—Prince Edward Island is an island (duh) located on the east coast. Although there are lots of islands on the east coast of Canada, it’s easy to spot which one is Prince Edward Island. It’s the one that looks like a crooked crescent moon…or a bumpy banana…or a jagged smile. Whenever people in Saudi Arabia asked me where I was from, I told them that I was from Canada. And if they asked me where in Canada, I said I was from Prince Edward Island, even though I’d never actually lived there. I knew this answer would stump most people, and I secretly liked the idea of being from a place that no one had ever heard of. I thought it made me sound mysterious. I was always shocked whenever I met someone who had heard of Prince Edward Island. Most often they were aware of its existence because they’d read L. M. Montgomery’s most famous book—and my favourite book of all time—Anne of Green Gables, which was set on the Island.

I groggily shuffled down the stairs, thinking about what I wanted to eat for breakfast. Hmm…maybe some leftover grape leaves stuffed with rice? A strange breakfast choice, I must admit, but that was what I was craving. I froze at the foot of the stairs when I detected distress in Mom’s voice.

“I just received your cryptic email. Why did you ask if we’re still alive? Why would you ask me something like that?” said Mom.

“Pollyanna, I’m so relieved to hear from you! We heard about the car bombings. Was your compound hit? We’ve been beside ourselves with worry!” I recognized the frantic voice. It belonged to Nanna, my maternal grandmother.

“What car bombings?” asked Mom.

“Several Western compounds in Riyadh were attacked a few hours ago. It’s all over the news,” said Nanna.

As soon as Nanna said the words “car bombings,” Dad, who had been making breakfast in the kitchen, zoomed to the television to switch on BBC World. I wandered into the living room and stared at the images of destroyed build-ings and rubble on TV. This explains all those ambulance sirens last night, I thought. When the news announcer identified the compounds, I turned to Dad in panic. I recognized the name of one of them. It adjoined my school, and many of my teachers lived there. “Do you think my teachers are okay?” I asked.

Normally, Dad would have said something comforting to downplay the situation so I wouldn’t worry, but this time he just said, “I don’t know.”

After assuring my grandmother that we weren’t dead, Mom got off the internet phone and joined us in front of the TV. Over the past several months, there had been a few minor car bombings—as if a car bombing could be described as minor—in Riyadh, so this tragic event shouldn’t have been that surprising. Nevertheless, it still came as a shock to us.

A few moments later, Mom said, “Page, there won’t be any school today, but your dad and I still have to go to work. Try not to watch too much news while we’re gone, and stay inside, okay?”

They each gave me a quick hug and hurried to get ready for work. I stood rooted to the spot in front of the TV. As they gathered their things and opened the door to leave, I heard Dad remark, “In Canada, school is cancelled for snowstorms, but here it’s for car bombings.” The door clicked shut before I could hear Mom’s reply.

Filed Under: Excerpts, Fiction, Web exclusives, Young Readers Tagged With: Acorn Press, Babysitting, fiction, Hope Dalvay, Prince Edward Island, Saudi Arabia, Summer, The Acorn Press, Welcome to Camp Fill in the Blank, Young Adult

June 26, 2020 by Colleen Landry

According to Page 2, Section A, Subsection 5F of my worn out copy of the Beauty Queen 101 Handbook, a piddly 1% of the population has (legally) worn a tiara and sash 24/7 for an entire year. Guess what, you guys? I’m among the elite blessed few to be in that 1% (My thoughts and prayers go out to those in the 99% who are searching for their life’s purpose—it must totally suck). Thirty-six years ago, I literally beat the odds…I became Miss Nackawic 1981. You heard me—I reigned over the town of Nackawic, NB, for 491 365 days. Let that sink in for a minute. A beauty queen wrote the book you are holding. For reals.

My path in life literally changed on that awesome September night in 1981. Before I became royalty, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to be when I grew up. It’s not that my future wasn’t bright—I mean, I was on a bowling team that finished in seventh place, and I was a solid C (ish) student—obviously I could have done anything with my life! Duh. It’s just that I wasn’t sure I wanted to be a professional bowler and yea…my marks were beyond outstanding, but what was the point of university?? Nah. I wanted some-thing more, and once I felt that cold, diamond-encrusted shiny tiara dig into my feathery bangs I knew what that something was—winning Miss World and total fame! Boom. The universe had spoken and I was listening. According to Page 2, Section A, Subsection 5F.2 of the Miss World handbook, only 0.000000001% of former beauty queens go on to become Miss World, but I intended to beat the odds again. I had the passion and the personality disorder to go all the way to the top, obviously. All I needed was the right pair of sandals and Miss World would never ever be mine for the taking. It felt amazing, at the age of sixteen, to finally have a meaningful purpose!

Since chances are you’ve never been in, much less won a pageant, I’d like to give you a behind-the-scenes glimpse into what it’s really like. Close your eyes and imagine it’s September 3, 1981, the night of the Miss Nackawic pageant. The arena is packed to the rafters with a custodian plain, regular people, desperate to find out who their new ruler will be. The lights on the stage are blinding and hot, and I’m standing there in my homemade pink, sheer(ish) chiffon gown, wishing I’d worn underwear. Whatever. A bead of sweat trickles down my cheeks, giving me an awesome dewy glow. I silently congratulate myself on my talent portion—an air guitar routine. I know deep down I nailed it even though I was super dizzy from swinging my head so much. I pray that the last-minute cartwheel I almost landed during the evening gown catwalk pays off for me—I did it to show my spontaneity, which is the fifth most desirable trait in a beauty queen according to Page 15, Section B, Subsection 3C of the handbook. Boom.

Next comes the interview portion. My question is: Should more businesses be wheelchair accessible? I answer: Duh. There should definitely be more businesses in Nackawic because I have to drive all the way to Fredericton to shop for shoes and that’s totally unfair! Nailed it. The judges go off to make their decision. The wait feels like twelve million years. Finally, the Master of Ceremonies walks toward the microphone. I’m so nervous I literally almost black out. The pressure makes me wish I was in the audience with the plain people. I take a deep breath. The M.C. opens the judges’ envelope and lets out a funny sound like a dying animal would make. (Weirdo) He shakes his head, shrugs his shoulders, and then says literally the best words I’ve ever heard in my entire life: “Um. This is a joke right?? Well, if you saaayy so…Miss Nackawic 1981 is Colleen Roy.”

The flashes from my parents’ the paparazzi cameras blind me. I’m literally attacked by my parents the press as they bombard me with praise and questions. At one point, they even bow before me. That’s when things get real—I’d waited my entire life for proof that I was better than everyone, and, when the people bowed, I knew it was true! I was literally the Chosen One and in that instant I knew I was made for a life of waving at peasants, wearing pretty gowns and riding on parade floats.

Can I be honest? After that night, I fully expected my life to spin out of control, but everyone in my town was terrified I’d end up like one of those child-actors-turned-cokeheads, so they really ignored me respected my time and space. I was too young to understand it at the time, but, looking back, I’m actually relieved I didn’t explode to stardom and turn into a diva. Instead, it was more of a delusion slow burn. I literally shudder to think of what those Hollywood overnight-success kids go through. Back to me now…

This book is my gift to you and the dreamer inside you. It’s the story of a small-town, sixteen-year-old girl with big hair and even bigger dreams—a girl who blossoms into a wrinkly stunning, middle-aged(ish) woman who wants more out of life but never gets it. It’s the story of one girl’s vision board and her extreme delusion perseverance when faced with reality over three decades’ worth of roadblocks. You too, can have what I have—a future filled with dirty laundry and Hamburger Helper hope that your big dream is just around the next corner.

Put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride at my expense. I hope this book makes you feel a whole lot better about your life of emotions. I think it will. I also hope you paid a minimum of $40 for it, because I have bills to pay.Wait. What?? Fourteen dollars and ninety-five measly cents is all you put down for this masterpiece?? Dear Publisher: You’re fired! Wow. Somebody owes me some friggin’ money.

Filed Under: Excerpts, Fiction, Web exclusives Tagged With: Chocolate River Publishing, Colleen Landry, fiction, humour, Midlife, Miss Nackawic Meets Midlife, New Brunswick, novel

November 14, 2019 by Vernon Oickle

On writing More Ghost Stories of Nova Scotia…

“It is possible that all of us have the gift of intuition, but only a few are able to tap into it.

There’s a lot of ground to cover when with the supernatural, but I would say that stories of forerunners, or premonitions, are my absolute favourite. Forerunners leave such an emotional mark on one’s heart and mind that the experience stays with you for a long time. The thing about a forerunner, too, is that they can appear to anyone at any time and in any place.

Living in Nova Scotia you’ve probably heard tales of haunted houses, ghost stories, reports of forerunners, and legends of ghost ships that appear and then disappear as quickly as they came. Tales of the unexplained and the unexplainable are common among the residents of this province and such stories have become the stuff of local legend. 

Call it a gut feeling. Call it a sixth sense. Or call it intuition, but there is that knowing of something with a certainty, even though you can’t explain how you know it.”

– Vernon Oickle 

Excerpt:

Shortly after Jimmy’s 26th birthday, he was preparing for a fishing trip that his captain estimated would last four or five days. Including the captain, there were four crewmembers on board and Jimmy was looking forward to this trip because he was saving money for a down payment on a house that he had been eyeing and he estimated that these earnings would give him enough to finally make the purchase. But while he was looking forward to the trip, his mother was dreading it.

In the days leading up to her son’s departure, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong. She couldn’t quite explain it, but she felt there was a dark cloud hanging over her family and she feared something terrible was about to happen. Because her husband had retired and neither of her older sons was scheduled to go out in the near future, she couldn’t shake the feeling that whatever was about to happen must involve Jimmy.

Fearing the worst, she tried for days to convince Jimmy to skip this trip, telling him that he didn’t need the money and offering to pay whatever difference he needed for his down payment on the house. But Jimmy wasn’t having any of that and as he packed his gear, he dismissed his mother’s fears as nothing more than the ramblings of a superstitious old woman.

On the morning of his departure, he kissed his mother goodbye as he always did, and told her he would see her in four or maybe five days. As he left through the kitchen, he paused at the back door and turned back to tell her not to worry. He insisted he would be okay.

But Helen was not so sure, and as she watched her youngest son walk down the back steps and disappear down the back walkway on his way to the wharf, she felt a deep gnawing in the pit of her stomach.

As the next two days crept by, the dark cloud followed Helen wherever she went. She could not shake the oppressive feeling that tragedy was near. She prayed that her son and his fellow crewmembers were okay and that they would make it safely back to port.

On the night of the second day of Jimmy’s trip, Helen was having an especially difficult time sleeping. Tossing and turning, she remembers glancing at the digital clock on the night table next to her bed. In glowing red numbers, the clock said it was 12:15 a.m.

Just then, she felt a strong urge to turn around and when she did, she was surprised to see Jimmy standing in the doorway. He said to her, “Don’t worry, Mom. Everything is okay. You can go to sleep now.”

Filed Under: Excerpts, Non-fiction

November 6, 2019 by Atlantic Books Today

Johnny Reid was a PEI legend. At the age of twelve, Johnny bought a deep fryer, 200 pounds of potatoes, and installed a telephone in the shed in his parents’ backyard. His best customers telephoned in their orders for hot French fries from the numerous bootleggers in Charlottetown’s east end. A boy on a bicycle delivered the hot fries. Johnny eventually parlayed that enterprise into Johnny’s Fish and Chips restaurant next to the train station, which morphed into Davy Jones Locker and the Prince Edward Lounge, later renamed JR’s Bar, where he showcased PEI and Canadian talent such as Anne Murray, Gene MacLellan, John Allan Cameron, and his new pal, Stompin’ Tom Connors.

He was one of the best draws I ever had. The place would be packed. They were lined up for a block every night of the week. That was his first show on the Island, and that’s when he met his wife Lena, at my place. She was working for me. He said to me, ”Who’s that girl?” I said, “She works here and her name is Lena, and don’t you try and steal her.” So they became friends and started going out, and on his next trip, she said, “I want to give you my notice. I’m going away.” Tom said, “We’re getting married. I want you to stand for me?” I said, “Jeez, Tom, I can’t stand for you. I’ll be at the wedding, but you can get anybody to stand for you.” I knew it was going to be on TV. Tom said, “If you don’t stand for me, I’ll never set foot inside your place again.” “Well since you put it that way,” I said, “I’ve not got much choice, do I?”

So, I stood for him, and, Pauline, who worked for me, was matron of honour and my wife Judy was bridesmaid at the Four Seasons Hotel up there in Toronto on the TV. So, here it was, Mutt and Jeff, great big tall Stompin’ Tom and short fat Johnny Reid.

1973: Johnny Reid with wedding Stomping Tom and Lena.

Elwood Glover’s Luncheon Date ran on CBC television in the 1960s and ’70s, and, in 1973, hosted Stompin’ Tom and Lena’s memorable wedding, with best man Johnny Reid. Tom’s and Johnny’s friendship began years earlier when they shared a cell in the 1911 Queens County jail, and both immediately recognized a fellow rebel and soulmate.

Ironically years later, Johnny bid and won the contract to feed the jail’s inmates. One of the prisoners wrote a letter to the paper criticizing the menu: he was tired of getting lobster three times a week. When I asked Johnny, he insisted it was steak, but his wife Judy confirmed the prisoner’s story. Either way it was a bizarre protest.

During the Second World War, Johnny worked in an aircraft factory in Amherst, NS. Back on PEI, the Royal Air Force (RAF) landed on PEI in 1940, and set up a training base where the present Charlottetown airport is. Islanders fell in love with these rather exotic airmen with their English and Scottish and Welsh accents.

Helen Cudmore’s family ran a large general store in Oyster Bed Bridge and Helen kept a diary of events both mundane and unusual.

In 1942, my sister Verna had a boyfriend named Ted Farrell from England, and he used to walk from the Charlottetown airport out here to Oyster Bed to visit her [twenty-one kilometres/thirteen miles]. Dad would drive him back as far down as the Milton Road, and he’d walk the rest of the way back to the airbase [thirteen kilometres/eight miles].

Would you see many RAF airmen out this way?

Quite a few, yes.

What brought them out here?

Girls. Nice-looking girls in this area. Here’s another entry: June 21st, 1955. Two neighbours married, Moses and Marjorie. And the groom passed away that same day. Died the same day he was married. They lived just up the hill here. Certainly, was a shock to everyone.

Helen, her mother, and her sisters all kept diaries. Thanks to Helen’s diary, I learned that in 1930 it cost $2 a day to stay in the hospital—the old Infirmary on Kensington Road—$5 for an operation, and a dollar a day for your hospital meals. The first two were deals, but $1 for hospital food? Better food at the 1911 jail.

On 25 July 1958, arguably the most influential American musician ever—not that he’d ever blow his own horn—jazz great Louis Armstrong played a show in Charlottetown. Twenty years earlier, he was paid $5,000 to appear opposite Ronald Regan in the movie Going Places singing the song “Jeepers Creepers” to a race horse with the same name. Even singing to a horse, Satchmo stole the show.

I can’t say for a fact, but I’d bet MacKenzie Dixon played the fiddle to his horses at one time or another. Mac was born in 1926 in South Melville where his family ran a flour and grist mill. Mac loved horses, and raised champion Clydesdales, but he bought an unusual used car to court what turned out to be the number one love in his life: his future wife Erma Ings.

The first car that I bought was a 1937 Terraplane. They were built by the Hudson Motor Company. The day we were married, a neighbour of ours was going to stand for me, my best man, and we were heading for the church in Millview—that’s where Erma came from—and down in Churchill Hollow, the front axle broke. We went right over the bank, and it was steep enough. Of course, we had no seatbelts in those days, and my head went down and I struck my nose and started bleeding all over my white shirt and tie. And believe it or not, the first car that came along was the RCMP, and I got in with them. That was a good start wasn’t it?

What happened to the car?

That was the end of that one. It served its purpose, it got me that far and that was it.

The Churchill and Strathgartney hills have claimed many cars over the decades. Model-Ts often had to back up the hill because of their gravity-fed carburetor. Johnny MacGillivray and his father before him had a blacksmith shop across from the church, and every spring, he and his team of horses would pull countless cars out of the mud. He said there was a bit of irony there.

One day, a car from Ontario coming off the Borden ferry ran into the back of Johnny’s car. The Ontario driver complained to the RCMP that Johnny hadn’t signalled a left turn, and this the Trans Canada Highway. Johnny protested, “Why would I signal? Everyone knows I live here.”

Mac Dixon, holding a photo of his mum, Edna Smith Dixon, in front of her piano.

Mac Dixon’s mother was Edna Smith Dixon, one of the multitalented Smith sisters, who grew up playing music and helping her parents run the Pleasant View Hotel in Hampton. The Pleasant View was a rambling, three-storey hotel where Upper Canadians and New Englanders came by rail, steamboat, and finally horse and coach to spend the summer months, basking on the beaches, enjoying the salt air, cool nights, and three meals a day—plus snacks—of the celebrated Smith home cooking.

When Edna was two years old, she fell from a third-storey window and landed on her back in front of the horrified guests. Not a scratch. As well as doing the high-diving act for people who had paid their two bits, Edna was a great cook. After she married Johnny Dixon, who was by that time running the mills, she’d probably fed half the countryside. She sometimes cooked for fourteen different people a day: farmers waiting for Johnny to mill their wheat and oats. As Mac said:

We’d feed their horses, and them, too. That was all free gratis. When my grandfather John Dixon was running the mill, this day, Matthew Smith, who ran the Pleasant View Hotel, [came] with a grist of wheat to get ground. His little daughter was with him, just came for the trip to the mill, you see. And John Dixon’s son Johnny Dixon was there, and he was two or three [years] older than this little girl, Edna Smith, and he came in to the mill and he thought she was going to be bored, sitting there, so he asked if she’d like him to show her around the farm. So, this was great.

And after she went home to the Pleasant View, her mother asked her how was her trip to the mill. “Oh,” she said, “it was a great trip, and this nice little boy Johnny Dixon took me by the hand and showed me all around the farm, the sheep, the lambs, everything.” Fifteen or sixteen years later, they were married. And became my parents. So that’s got to be my favourite story, wouldn’t you think, Dutch?

Edna and Johnny played concerts at the Hampton Hall, piano and violin. Mac was also a fiddle player, and once I managed to get Mac and two other millers together. Turned out, all three were fiddle players, and spent three hours talking about old fiddle tunes instead of grinding wheat. So instead of Red Fife it was “Red Wing.”

Muriel Boulter MacKay

From Dixon’s Mills to Saskatchewan, the land of wheat, via Albany, PEI, where Muriel Boulter MacKay was born in 1895. In 1918, after surviving the Halifax Explosion a year earlier, Muriel went west on the harvest excursion train to teach school in Saskatchewan. That’s where she met and married George MacKay, a farmer originally from PEI.

January 1918 in Saskatoon, Knox Presbyterian Church, and the Reverend Wylie Clark. I remember it all quite well. It was thirty below. There was no wind but the air was full of frost. He was from this area, right up opposite the school. I knew him for six years before I married him.

[He courted me with] horse and wagon. He had a lovely horse, a prize horse, it would beat any horse on the road.

Was that one of the reasons you were attracted to him?

Oh, I don’t know. I know my parents weren’t attracted to him because he was a farmer and Mother said, “Don’t marry a farmer. Marry somebody else, don’t marry a farmer. Too much work and too little money.”

It turned out to be a very successful marriage. When George was PEI’s Lieutenant-Governor, they hosted Queen Elizabeth at Fanningbank, and Prince Philip was very curious about Island farming methods and crops. And who better to ask…

Gladys Bryan

 

I was at my grandmother’s and Heber’s father had bought a house in Alberton, and they were shingling and Heber came up to help his father. I was over looking up at the men shingling the roof someone said, “Which one of those Bryan boys do you like?” “Oh,” I said, “I think I’d like the little one.” So anyway, he must have heard me. He came down the ladder and when he was leaving, he came over to say hello. He said, “Could I come back and take you for a drive tonight?” Sure enough, he showed up. I was only sixteen then.

They courted and sparked for two years, and when Gladys turned eighteen, Heber popped the big question in a typically male roundabout way.

Guess where he proposed to me? Underneath an apple tree. We were visiting friends in Elmsdale, they invited us for supper, and while they were washing the dishes, we went out into the orchard, and were sitting under the apple trees, and Heber said, “Gladys,” he said, “would you like a job for the rest of your life?” I said, “What do you mean?” “Well, we could get married.”

What was your job going to be? Looking after him for the rest of your life?

Yeah. So anyway, I said yes, and so we were married about a month after. My gosh, what a time that was.

This is where Muriel MacKay’s mother’s advice about not marrying a farmer might make sense.

We never got a honeymoon. They were picking potatoes at the Bryan farm when we got married. They had the great big party there that night. Oh, we danced all night. Then in the morning, they had the potato pickers coming. I spent my first married day cooking for potato pickers, at eighteen years old. Now, just imagine, eh?

14 October 1936. And the future didn’t look much brighter for Gladys and Heber when they took possession of their own fifty-acre farm down the road.

Honest to heaven, a grasshopper would starve to death jumping across that farm.

The other side of marrying a farmer is, of course, the farmer’s extraordinary optimism. Every time they plant a seed, a farmer takes a chance, hoping for rain and sun—and very few grasshoppers—to harvest a crop four or five months down the road. Gladys was as optimistic as Heber, a perfect match. For years, to make ends meet, they took turns delivering the mail, first by horse and wagon, then in an old Model-A car Gladys hand-painted. They contributed to the school and their church, and became valued neighbours. Over the years, the Bryans added hundreds of acres to the original fifty and built their farm up into a hugely successful operation. That and their good name is their legacy.

Bygone Days Folklore, Traditions & Fingernails
Reginald “Dutch” Thompson
Nimbus Publishing

Filed Under: Excerpts, Non-fiction, Web exclusives Tagged With: Nimbus Publishing, non-fiction

April 30, 2019 by Atlantic Books Today

Boulder Publication has this to say of Agnes Ayre’s Notebook: Recipes from Old St. John’s, by Roger Pickavance and Agnes Marion Murphy:

“In the early twentieth century, Newfoundland trailblazer Agnes Marion Miller Ayre became an outspoken advocated for allowing women to vote. She was also an avid botanist and an accomplished artist who published a book, Wild Flowers of Newfoundland. One overlooked aspect of Ayre’s remarkable life was a recipe collection she wrote in a small notebook, starting in 1917. She didn’t bother with traditional recipes–not boiled dinner or pan-fried cod to be found–but collected out-of-the-ordinary dishes for the time, along with ingenious ways of being frugal with leftovers.”

So, though it may be almost May, it seems it might still be meatloaf season. Try Agnes’s own recipe, which more than holds up to the test of time!

MEATLOAF (Serves 6 – 8)

2 pounds (900 g) trimmed weight beef
1 pound (450 g) raw ham
5 (50 g each) cream cracker
½ cup (125 ml) milk

1½ teaspoons (10 g) salt
½ teaspoon (1.5 g) pepper

METHOD

Grease a 3-quart pudding basin, loaf pan, or other similar container. Grind (or chop by hand) the beef and the ham. Smash the crackers into fine crumbs. Mix the crumbs, egg, salt, pepper, and milk to make a smooth paste. Mix in the ground beef and ham. Put this in the prepared container, tie a cloth over the top, and steam for 2 hours. Do not let the steamer boil dry; check the water level about halfway through and add boiling water as necessary.

Preheat the oven to 350ºF. Turn out the meat loaf and the cooking juices onto a baking dish and bake 1 hour, basting 4 or 5 times with the juices in the pan, or until the juices are reduced to a glaze and starting to blacken at the edges so that basting is no longer possible. Serve hot or cold.

Filed Under: Excerpts, History, Non-fiction Tagged With: Boulder Publications, Food, meatloaf, Newfoundland

April 18, 2019 by Atlantic Books Today

Preface

Allison Watson, stargazing in Forillon National Park, Quebec, 2018. (Amy Watson)

I opened my eyes and everything was dark. I knew I was alone, in a hospital bed, but I wasn’t sure on which wing or floor. I was pretty sure I was still in the Toronto General Hospital (TGH) but had no idea how much time had passed since I had last seen my family. When I tried to call out for a nurse, I found I couldn’t speak due to a tube lodged in my throat. My arms felt as if they were weighed down with lead, so I couldn’t wave for attention either. As I looked for a call bell to summon a nurse, I realized that I couldn’t focus on anything: my vision was blurry and the world was spinning a little. My glasses were nowhere to be found. I could see people moving in the hallway, but they seemed to be spinning too. No one was coming into my room.The dead silence was so unusual. No machines were beeping, no people were talking, none of the usual hospital noises. the lead feeling in my arms, I tried to wave in someone from the people milling about in the hallway, but no one was coming to check on me. They were all moving in jerky motions while I kept waving. I quickly exhausted myself and lay motionless, wondering what was happening.

I started to panic as I was suddenly positive the blurred vision and spinning world meant that I had carbon dioxide poisoning. I needed to tell someone what was wrong. My assumption wasn’t such a stretch, as the last thing I remembered was being told that my carbon dioxide levels were high. I was sure I was either still in that hazy, poisoned world or that it was happening again. My panic mounted while I continued to be unable to get anyone into the room to help me. The people I kept seeing in the hallway were ignoring me. And why did the unit have a cardboard cut-out of a smiling, mustachioed man in a sombrero selling tacos?

Eventually, someone solidified in the doorway to tell me that I needed to wait for my nurse to return from her break. I tried to communicate to him through hand gestures that I was being poisoned, but he didn’t understand my frantic waving. I must have somehow conveyed my panic, as he reluctantly stepped into the room. He brought in a paper and pencil and gave it to me so I could write down what I was trying to say. I grabbed them eagerly but discovered that my hands wouldn’t respond to the motions I tried to make. Instead, they were shaking uncontrollably and my eyes couldn’t focus enough on the paper to see what I was attempting to write. In my frustration, I wrote a bunch of squiggly lines and handed the paper back to the man.

He then summoned someone else into the room to try to decipher my scrawl, but this woman was just as befuddled as he was. After many, many tries, I managed to write “co2,” and they seemed to get the point that I thought my levels were high. The woman hung a bag of something on my iv pole and I felt a bit better. (For all I know, it was just stronger pain or sleep medication.) The man then asked if he could pray over me, to which I didn’t respond as I was still confused, though certain I was poisoned. He prayed and then left the room. I soon fell back asleep.

When I woke up again, lights were on and there was a nurse sitting behind the glass panel in front of my room. She noticed I was awake and came into the room, apologized for the other man’s behaviour and that I had wakened alone. I gestured to my throat and the equipment in the room by way of asking why it was there and what had happened.

She responded, “Need a suction?”

I had no idea what she meant, but I must’ve nodded as she suddenly began shoving a tube into my lungs. It felt like I was choking and made me want to cough but when I tried, it was impossible. I didn’t have the energy to move the muscles required to cough. As quickly as it had started, the suctioning was over and the tube was gone. I could breathe easier, but I still had no idea what had just happened.

All the nurse told me was that it was still early and I needed to try to go back to sleep. The next time I wakened, a different nurse told me that physiotherapy would be in later that day to get me up. I gestured to convey all my questions, so she brought me a pen and paper to write again. I tried to write down my multitude of questions such as, “Where am I?” and,

“Do I have carbon dioxide poisoning?” but my hands were still too shaky and my eyes still couldn’t focus. Somehow, the nurse realized that I was panicking and told me I was experiencing side effects from the medication. I wasn’t sure what medication she was referring to but was happy to know, at last, that I wasn’t being poisoned.

About the fourth time I woke up, I finally managed to communicate to the nurse that I had no idea what had happened. Where was I? Did I have a lung transplant? Was it good news? I don’t remember much from those days, but I do remember her staring at me and saying, “Oh honey, yes, it’s good news, very good news. You had your lung transplant four days ago.”

Transplanted: My Cystic Fibrosis Double-Lung Transplant Story

Allison Watson

Published by: Nimbus Publishing

*Transplant will hit the bookshops April, 2019.

Filed Under: Excerpts, Non-fiction

December 5, 2018 by Mark Cullen

Escape to Reality
Mark Cullen
Nimbus Publishing

A highly accomplished American journalist living in London, England, takes a walk in the park each day for some months; it changes everything. He feels better, has more energy, his memory improves (no more sticky notes on his computer screen), and he feels less stressed.

A seven-year-old child who was once “addicted” to computer games was afraid of the outdoors. He wanted to stay indoors, “where the electrical outlets are.” He felt safe there. He understood it and there were no bad things to make him nervous. Once he was introduced to the outdoor experience, the same kid was able to shed the false security from four walls and a climate-controlled environment. He discovered that there was adventure out there, in wide-open spaces that engaged his intellect and imagination. He was challenged in ways that he could only have imagined while indoors, and only if a computer program led him down that path. The metamorphosis experienced by this child out of doors inspired the writing of the landmark book The Last Child in the Woods by Richard Louv, published in 2005.

Illustrations by Sarah Duggan, courtesy of Nimbus

I went to visit an old friend, a very “senior” senior; okay, he was 97. Hugh Beaty could only move around using a walker. He was on oxygen and was housebound in a modern facility built for the aged. To all intents and purposes, he was well taken care of. Clean, well fed, and before bed he was allowed one ounce of his favourite Scotch to help him sleep. Life was grand, except when it wasn’t.

“What do you miss most Hugh?” I asked.

“Freedom to move and go out of doors,” he answered.

“How would you like to go for a drive? It is a beautiful July day and we can roll the windows down,” I said.

He looked at me incredulously. It was a look that I had become used to, one that said, Are you out of your mind? A long pregnant pause while he thought about it.

“Yeah! Let’s do it.” The words had no sooner left his mouth than he was gently tugging at the translucent tubes that flowed from a portable oxygen tank up his nostrils.

“Are you OK without your oxygen, Hugh?”

He assured me that he was just fine.

Slowly, carefully, with some assistance, we manoeuvred the big man into my car. He landed in the passenger side bucket seat with a quiet thump. I tossed his walker into my trunk and slid into the driver’s seat.

“Where would you like to go?” I asked as we pulled away from the curb.

“I don’t know. But this is nice,” was all he said.

“How ʼbout I take you to the farm?”

Another sidelong stare. “Really?”

“Why not. It is only ten minutes away. We can see how things have changed since you left a few months ago.”

It was agreed. Windows down, wind gently blowing into the cabin of the car, we were off.

As I pulled slowly into the driveway, I knew that there was no way that I could get him out of the car, so I pulled in to park square to the front of the house that Hugh was born in, where he had spent all but four years—the “war years” of 1940–1944. I parked directly in front of the steps that he had hidden under when he was four years old, trying to get away from a father who was about to mete out some well-deserved discipline for some infraction on Hugh’s part.

“Would you like a coffee?” I asked, as I reached around to the back seat of the car for my thermos. He accepted my offer. I poured. And we sat for a long moment, enjoying the shade of his sugar maple tree on a typical summer day.

I didn’t really know how much Hugh enjoyed that trip until three weeks later, at his funeral. His son Bob told me that his dad had called him the same day at his home in Calgary to say that I had picked him up and taken him to “the farm.” A trip down the road with fresh air flowing through the windows. A moment to reflect on the past.

A man discovers a new life through the discipline of walking through public parks in the densely populated UK city of London. A child discovers a world of adventure outside the four walls of his home, the only one he really knew, until he discovered a different place in his own backyard. And an elderly friend revisits his past on a final trip to his family farm.

As a lifetime gardener and writer, I am fascinated by the changes that have taken place over the last couple of generations in the Canadian garden and nature’s power to affect us. Not too many years ago, we adopted chemicals and machinery to mould and craft our landscapes into images that suited us, regardless of the environmental costs: 2,4-D and gas-powered leaf blowers are two cases in point.

We gardeners are now passionate people with less of an interest in the newest rose introduction or another addition to our dahlia collection but a much greater interest in attracting pollinators, creating biodiversity, and pursuing the social benefits of the gardening experience through community gardens, social media, and even farmers’ markets.

This book explores this new mentality. Escape to Reality turns our attention away from the many things that distract us, many of them electronic, and focuses our attention on experiences and lessons from the world outside four walls, many of them in our own yards.

This is an Excerpt from the Preface of Mark Cullen’s New Book, Escape to Reality. Copyright Mark Cullen, courtesy Nimbus Publishing.

Filed Under: # 88 Winter 2018, Excerpts, Non-fiction Tagged With: and Gardening is Changing the World, environment, Escape to Reality, gardening, Green, How the World is Changing Gardening, Mark Cullen, nature, Nimbus Publishing, non-fiction, Nova Scotia, Sarah Duggan, UK

November 15, 2018 by Mark Critch

Son of a Critch
Mark Critch
Viking Canada

The only other uses of the phone table were the shining of the shoes and the washing of the cat—the two chores Dad took very seriously. Dad had one colour and type of shoe: black dress shoes were for work, formal events, jogging, beach wear, and shovelling. He went through a lot of polish. Shampooing our Siamese cat was more involved.

The cat was as old as I was. Dad brought home the newborn kitten the same week I was born. He’d won it in a card game. Dad had won all his opponents’ money, and in an act of desperation, the poor loser had wagered the animal. Mom had never wanted the cat, and so it was my father’s responsibility. He was proud of his prize and would heap praise upon the cat as if it were a Grand Prix–winning show horse.

“Look at that cat! That’s some cat. See the way her tail moves. When a dog wags its tail, it’s happy. But when a cat wags its tail, it’s angry. See? Look at her tail wagging. Something has her—ow! The damn thing scratched me!”

The cat never liked Dad. She would hiss at him and scratch him. This did nothing to deter him from pursuing the object of his affection.

Perhaps Dad was so adamant about this cat-cleaning chore because he wasn’t otherwise what you’d call a handyman. He had what he called a “tool kit.” It was an old metal bisqueen elizabethcuit tin with a picture of a young Queen Elizabeth on it. Inside was a half-used roll of black electrical tape, some random screws, a small flat-head screwdriver with a wooden handle, a can of black shoe polish, one roll of black thread, one roll of white thread, one roll of tan thread, eight buttons (mixed), a brand-new roll of masking tape, some change, and a seven-inch record of “A Night at the Copacabana with Tony Martin.”

Next to the tin he kept a rusty hammer and a collection of dried-out paintbrushes. If something needed fixing, Dad would open the tin and ponder which tool was right for the task at hand. Usually the electrical tape would win out and the old man would apply it sparingly to the broken glass, loose hinge, or wobbly table leg. There was never need of a second roll of tape in my entire lifetime.

Whenever there was work to be done around the house he would put on his work clothes. These consisted of a white T-shirt, a pair of tan pants, and dress shoes.This was also his preferred outfit for cat grooming.

Someone had convinced Dad that cats needed to be shampooed. So, once a month he would get a blanket and put it over his lap, don winter gloves, and shampoo the cat. Afterward, the cat would lock eyes with him as she licked herself, seeming to say, “See? This is how a cat cleans itself. And I would enjoy it a lot more, too, if you hadn’t spayed me, asshole.” Of course, first the cat had to be caught.

cat shampooWhenever it saw Dad in his handyman uniform it would hide under the biggest thing it could find—the stereo. The old man would reach underneath it, the cat digging her talons into his thick winter gloves in a timeless battle of man vs. beast.

Eventually, she would dig her nails into the carpet as he tugged at her hindquarter. “See? Her tail is wagging, that means she is—ow!”

Then he would carry his hissing prize to the telephone table and rub in the cat shampoo. Sometimes I’d be called upon to rub the cat’s fur with a damp tea towel to “activate it.” This didn’t so much shampoo the cat as anger her fur, making it stand up in little matted waves on an arch-backed sea of feline fury.

Dad would admire his handiwork and the “cleaned” cat. Now covered in shampoo and somehow drier than she was before, she’d hurl herself off his lap and disappear for days.

Excerpted from Son of a Critch by Mark Critch. Copyright (c) 2018 by Mark Critch. Publishing by Viking Canada, an imprint of Penguin Canada, a division of Penguin Random House Canada Limited. Reproduced by arrangement with the Publisher. All rights reserved. 

Filed Under: # 87 Fall 2018, Editions, Excerpts, Non-fiction Tagged With: Anecdote, Cat, Cats, Dad, Fathers and Sons, Gambling, humour, Humour Writing, Kitten, Mark Critch, memoir, Newfoundland, Newfoundland and Labrador, NL, Penguin Random House, Queen Elizabeth, St. John's, Tony Martin, Viking Canada

November 6, 2018 by Afua Cooper

Afua Cooper

Peggy is in the habit of running away
it would be bad enough
if she left by herself
but now she is taking her children with her.
She is a very bad woman
a mean slave
she goes to the outskirts of the city
and roams in the bushes
eating berries
and wading in the Don River
catching salmon
that still travel to these parts

She has erected a hut of sorts
from the brambles of the elderberry tree
she lived there with Amy and Milly for three weeks
until Peter sent the constables to retrieve her
he returned the children to the house
but lodged Peggy in jail

Now he wants to sell her
but neither Joseph Brant
nor Matthew Elliot
wants to buy her
on account of her fugitive career
though they had promised Peter they would buy her.
Because no one wants her
Peter has to keep her in jail
he resents paying the jailer’s fee
If only this mean slave
would behave!

Peggy’s incorrigible son Jupiter
has followed in her fugitive steps
he has Just ran off
someone saw him in the vicinity of the Don River
around Pottery Road
lurking about Mr. Long’s farm
Peter has sent the constables after him.

Peter really wishes to be rid of Peggy
I for one do not want her ever again in this house
I hate the very sight of her
after she smashed the fine China
I crossed the sea with from Ireland

Because the jailer’s fee is mounting
Peter is forced to put a ‘For Sale’ ad in the paper
Matthew Elliot has disappointed us
Joseph Brant the same
perhaps someone else will take pity on Peter
And take the wretch and her son off his hand

I have already gifted my god-daughter Elizabeth Dennison
With Milly and Amy.

Filed Under: # 87 Fall 2018, Excerpts, Poetry Tagged With: Afua Cooper, Canada, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Peggy Pompadour, poet laureate, Poetry, Slavery, Upper Canada

September 20, 2018 by Carole Langille

 

 

 

 

 

Each time I entered prison I signed in, locked my coat and purse in the locker and put on a bulletproof vest. A guard led me down one hall and up another, our stride punctuated by waiting at several locked doors to be buzzed through. Each week I tried to memorize where I was going.

Writing workshops were in a concrete room painted off-white. There were no windows, no colour except for the red fire extinguisher and the clock on the wall with its red numerals. Triangular desks were arranged in a semicircle; chairs filled with sand were too heavy for prisoners to use as weapons.

“Poetry addresses individuals in their most intimate, private, frightened and elated moments…because it comes closer than any other art form to addressing what cannot be said,” the poet Merwin says. For years I had been teaching poetry in the creative writing program in a university in Halifax. Now I wanted to use poems to inspire inmates to write about what mattered most to them.

I contacted a society that worked with inmates and outlined a writing workshop that would encourage participants to write about their lives. The society arranged for me to meet with a committee at the prison. I was in luck. The head officer was looking for new programs and I was given permission to volunteer.

I had to go to a presentation given by a security risk officer who warned me that inmates would try to manipulate me, would feign interest in the workshops and try to gain my trust. He showed a display of weapons prisoners had made which had been smuggled into prison, and noted the body’s orifices in which they were smuggled. He said all prisoners were bad, otherwise why would they be there? Then I was free to leave.

I too was judgmental, especially about the risk officer. Unlike him, I believed the men and women I would work with would be complicated people, that their stories, if they chose to share then, would be important to hear. As Bryan Stevenson, an attorney who fights for the wrongfully accused on death rows, said, “People are more than the worst thing we’ve ever done… Even if you kill someone, you’re not just a killer.”

Now I was given a chance to work with people trapped behind bars and show that it might be possible to find freedom, even in prison, by writing about experiences that were baffling, joyful, and painful, but whose memories lingered. I knew writing clarified thoughts. And when thinking became clearer, actions were more comprehensible. But it was not the stories they wrote that were the most important part of the workshop.

At the very first workshop, just before the guard left to bring in prisoners, I knew the door would lock behind him leaving no way out and asked what would happen in case of fire. He pointed out that the room was concrete; nothing could burn. The workshops too, I would soon understand, would be more a gathering place of tears than fire. And yet, as soon as the inmates came into the room, something ignited in me. I was glad to be there.

There were six inmates in the workshop the first day. I handed out the poem “How I Go to the Woods” by Mary Oliver, which ends,

If you have ever gone to the woods with me, I must love you very much.

Randy said the poem reminded him of his favourite place. Randy, a Black man in his early 20s, was very handsome; he could have been a model. He was keenly attentive and respectful when he talked to the other participants. There did not seem to be tension between white and Black men in the workshop. All six men wrote about being near water—a lake, an ocean, a river—that brought them comfort. Randy’s piece was about a lake near his house where he used to walk his dogs. “I know the lake, and the lake knows me,” he wrote.

One man asked what my favourite place was. I told him I loved going off the path when I walked in the woods though I was always a little afraid a bear would attack me. I said that my husband was not an alarmist and he explained there were no bears in the woods behind our house, but still I worried.

Randy said, “My aunt is an—what did you say—alarmist. Someone walks past and she looks out the window and worries about who is passing by.” He asked, “Tell me what metaphor is again?”

When I explained, he wanted an example.  “Chaos is a friend of mine,” I said and he wrote it down. “Bob Dylan wrote that,” I said, but none of them had heard of Bob Dylan.

The following week I asked them to write about something that happened with a friend or sibling when they were younger. I said, “If the memory lingers, even if the incident seems trivial, it’s important in some way.”

I only knew Randy for six hours over a six-week period but his interest in the poems I handed out, and his desire to work hard to express himself, was like a force field. At the end of one workshop he said, “You know it’s a good class when it lasts a half hour longer than scheduled!” When Randy wrote about an accident he had in Grade 5, I told him he needed more details and a week later he brought in the piece filled with descriptions and information.

He wrote about the place where he and his two best friends went their separate ways at lunch hour and how, at that spot, he was hit by a truck. He managed to struggle home for lunch but did not tell his mother what had happened, though she knew something was wrong. When he limped back to school, the principal called his name over the loudspeaker. His heart raced as if he were being hit again. The man in the truck had come to the school to call an ambulance and wanted to know why Randy had left. For some reason Randy had thought he would get into trouble. He ended the piece saying repercussions still remain because of the accident. Everyone in the group was interested in what he wrote.

At the next six-week set of workshops that I gave, on another wing, I was informed that the men in this group were hardened criminals. I wondered what that meant. Nathan was a slim, tall, young man. He was gentle and shy, his voice soothing. When I had to miss a workshop because there was a shutdown at the prison, and I apologized at the next meeting, Nathan said he too was sorry that I wasn’t able to be there. That day he no longer had his large Afro, but a close cut. He seemed down. The correctional officer told me his trial would be taking place later that week.

I asked the men to write freestyle for 10 minutes beginning with, “It’s not true that…” Nathan wrote that it was not true that fog was depressing. He wrote how he loved walking down foggy roads, being invisible, imagining a different world than the one he was in. He talked about the effect music had when he listened as walked in a dense mist, over a bridge, the fog closing behind him so he could not see where he just was. The mood was striking and the idea of writing about fog, surprising. The other participants liked the piece and I did too.

Several of the pieces Nathan wrote were strong. He was open to my critiques. When he read his poem about a candy store I challenged him to write a poem that did not rhyme, or not to choose a word just because it rhymed.

He said, “Yeah, you found me out. I didn’t work hard on this.”

I asked Nathan if he would be interested in getting his GED and he said he’d already gotten that when he was an inmate in Yarmouth. Nathan was in his early 20s. How many years had he spent in prison?

At the last workshop one of the men said that I’d asked them to read their work but had never shared a poem of mine. I didn’t have any of my poetry books with me, but recited “Not in the Warm Earth” from memory. I told them I wrote it after I had a dream that I was on a raft with my parents and they fell off. I couldn’t save them. I said it was a powerful dream because it reminded me we are all in the same boat. Some get off earlier, some stay on longer, but we all navigate unpredictable water.

“That’s deep,” Nathan said after I read the poem. He said he liked these lines:

In the middle of the night they wake me. They tell me they’re worried. I’ve made mistake after mistake.

I never asked what inmates were accused of. I didn’t want my impression filtered through the lens of crimes they did or did not commit. But sometimes correctional officers let information slip. This is how I learned that Nathan and Randy were accused of luring a pizza deliveryman, the father of two young children, to their house and murdering him. I had heard about this crime on the news months before I began the workshops, without remembering the names of the men accused. The articles and news reports did not go into details or motives, which made the incident seem even more horrifying. I remembered thinking the men who did this were monsters. But Nathan? Randy?

I gave workshops in the prison for a year. When I left the province for a few months and returned, I continued giving writing workshops, but not in prison. I needed a break. I was worn down but not for the reasons I thought I would be.

Each week, when I’d walked down those windowless halls, the iron doors clanging behind me, I felt again and again that the pain and longing in that crowded building created a spiritual intensity which made these cells a holy place. I cared about these men because, even in these six-week workshops, I got a glimpse of what mattered to them. They shared so much. It wasn’t the stories they’d written that made such an impression on me. The stories were only a vehicle, along with poems we discussed, that elicited memories and feelings participants shared and which helped everyone in that room get to know each other better. This is why, in such a short period of time, I felt close to these men and women.

But I was also worn down because the inmates were given so little assistance or regard. What programs were there for rehabilitation?

I thought about them often. And then, more than a year after the last workshop, I heard on the news that Randy was on trial. The report said Nathan had already been convicted and sentenced to life. The announcement ripped through me. I couldn’t sleep. My husband said, “Don’t watch the news before you go to bed.” But I kept thinking about these men and the death of the deliveryman, someone they’d known. The heart of the story was missing.

“The facts speak for themselves, but never speak for us,” the writer John Edgar Wideman said.

I felt such grief. The words “All my Relations” are spiritual because they address an essential truth: we are all related. Our commonalities are more prevalent than our differences. Yet some experiences are beyond control, turning a life into a time bomb. Then a person makes decisions that cause irrevocable pain. These two men convicted of murder seemed like my relatives whose disregarded lives and experiences no one would know.

How do we help those in need? It is a crucial question because isn’t this the only way we can save each other?

Filed Under: Excerpts, Non-fiction, Web exclusives Tagged With: Bob Dylan, Bryan Stevenson, Carole Langille, Criminalization, Criminology, Doing Time, Forgiveness, In the Prison, Incarceration, Judgment, Literary Workshops, Mary Oliver, Merwin, Not in the Warm Earth, Poetry, prison, Racialization

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